My Stoic Journey

A lot of my friends know that I’ve been into Stoicism for a while. However, I think only one person knows exactly when I started and what made me do it—why I care so much that I’m investing hours every day, putting my money into making it happen, putting myself out there, being so transparent publicly, and even risking my reputation for Stoicsticated.

First and foremost, I genuinely believe in everything I write. I spend a ridiculous amount of time on each paragraph because I want it to align with what I believe and what has helped me. My first introduction to Stoicism came thanks to one of the most inspiring people in my life, for whom I’m extremely grateful. He gave me one of Ryan Holiday’s books around November 2022, during what was perhaps one of the lowest points in my life, for reasons that seem trivial in hindsight. I was struck by how these ideas weren’t just self-help advice but rather a grounded philosophy practiced by some of history’s greatest leaders. I was so impressed that I went on to read Meditations by Marcus Aurelius.

That was it for me. From that point, there was no turning back. I felt like I’d discovered a kind of “cheat code.” Was it really that simple? Love your fate, live fully because life is short, take care of your loved ones, stay disciplined, be a good human—is that all there is? Of course, in theory, it sounds easy. But implementing it? That’s the hard part, and soon enough, I had the chance to test what I’d learned.

Fast forward to February 2023. For the first time in my life, I got a message that my mother was in the hospital with something that could’ve been serious (thankfully, everything was resolved, and now she’s healthy). At the same time, about 130 kilometers away, I had work obligations that needed me in person, and I’d just started seeing with a wonderful person who’s now my girlfriend . So… it was quite a complicated month.

I was constantly traveling between the town where my parents lived and where I was working, trying to see my mother as much as possible, supporting my father at work and home, staying professional, and giving my girlfriend the attention she deserved. My friend’s parents even sent us a bag of food from a supermarket in Bulgaria for my dad because they knew we didn’t have much time to cook. For that, I am forever grateful.

Then something strange happened… I felt sad, happy, tired, overwhelmed, and motivated all at once, but I got through it all. I was there for everyone, with no complaints, and everything got done. Previously, such situations would’ve thrown me off. For example, when I was in university, finals would make me nervous, tired, and unfulfilled, and I’d often shut myself off from family and friends the week before.

But this time, I had the tools. I was confident, calm, and collected, and I can honestly say this experience made me a better man. My relationships with my parents, partner, and friends improved, I got promoted from software engineer to team lead, and my mental health was in a much better place than it had been just a few months earlier. Stoicism really worked for me.

Of course, there were challenges and happy moments afterward, but let’s jump to this year. Around March, I started thinking about creating something related to Stoicism. I wanted to give people the tools that Stoicism had given me to improve their lives. However, there was always an excuse—the timing was wrong, there was too much work, or I was scared.

Then in August 2024, an important client was visiting the office. The schedule was jam-packed, with no room for error, and things were going better than expected. One day during a business lunch, my phone started ringing. My parents called a couple of times, and I muted it. Then my brother called. At that point, I knew something was wrong. I excused myself, went to the bathroom, and called him back. He told me that our grandma had passed away. I felt shock and sadness and wanted to cry right there, but people were counting on me. Instantly, I knew what I had to do.

As a brother, I made sure my brother was okay. As a son, I checked on my parents. As a partner, I explained the situation to my girlfriend. And as a team lead, I returned to the meeting. I felt terrible, but I controlled my emotions, and the meeting went well. At the first chance, I went to be with my family so we could get through it together.

Later that night, a thought kept coming back to me—in the car, in the shower, before I went to sleep, and every day since: I had to do this. I had to start doing what I’d known all along this year—to explain, show, and educate people about Stoicism and how to apply it. I had to give back because Stoicism had helped me in too many ways to ignore. As cliché as it sounds, if even one person benefited from it the way I did, it would all be worth it.